Always Riddikulus

Goodbye, Always Riddikulus.

2011-07-20T15:16:00.000-07:00

I've decided, as I am going to be entering college in the fall, that I need to move on with my life. But don't you go thinking that this means no more blogging. No way. I am just done with THIS BLOG. I am moving on to a newer, as of now, empty site called www.natparker.com. I think I have known for a while now, just as Harry knew he held a horcrux inside of him, that I have been done with this blog and I just needed it to be made final for myself. So without further ado, I say goodbye with one last quote.

"It's not over." -Neville Longbottom (DHp2)

This is Totally Not Legit

2010-11-29T17:51:00.000-08:00

I realize that I haven't been blogging lately, but I really need to concentrate on my very late blog post for the Harbinger Online, my school newspaper's website (click that like a boss), thus I am posting this very brief thingy to tell you to go there and see some stuff.

On a non-related, but just as pressing note, I have realized that I begin a lot of sentences and blogs with the word "so". "So" is not another word for um. It represents a consequence of a previous event, just like THUS. I need to get that into my brain.

"Where do cows go for fun? To the MOOOOVIES."

Oh gosh.

-Natalie

Awkward Times and Such

2010-10-07T20:34:00.000-07:00

Today, I was speaking with one of my good friends, Katy. She has a photographic memory and has almost every line from every Harry Potter movie memorized. Our conversations usually begin with me saying something like, "Do that line, you know the one from Goblet of Fire? The one in the tent? Victor I love you..." Katy then promptly finishes, "Victor I do, when we're apart my heart beats only for yoooooou!" And then she spouts out each and every line preceding and following the aforementioned line. She's pretty amazing.

But getting to the point (because apparently there must be one) Katy and I got to talking about awkward moments. Not embarrassing moments, mind you, really awkwardly strange times. Awkward moments can be embarrassing, but awkward moments differ in that they don't make you sneak off to your car to cry like some embarrassing times have done for me. (So, I cry. Big deal.) I enjoy recounting awkward moments, while I can only appreciate the embarrassing times long after they have occurred. For example, one time I saw my middle-aged, butch (though female) math teacher at the gynecologist. I didn't feel shameful at seeing her, but it was truly, awfully, awkward. SO PEOPLE, I have solicited you to regale me with some of your most awkward moments. Did you walk in on your crush, Cho, while she was staring at a picture of her beloved dead boyfriend whose death you witnessed? Did you then promptly make-out with her? Share with me people, and we will partake of awkwardness together.

“You know the prefects bathroom on the third floor? *bobs towards Harry with a sense of hesitation and awkwardness* Not a bad place for a bath. Just take your egg and mull things over in the hot water.” –Cedric Diggory

-Natalie

Oh yeah, I've done some stuff for my school newspaper's website. Check it out here.

Support.

2010-08-15T21:23:00.000-07:00

I'm looking at colleges. To be specific, state colleges. And I've got a BIG BIG BIG decision to make. This decision includes choosing a financially savvy option that will still guarantee me an excellent education. Because my parents aren't funding college for me. I won't be stranded if I need something, but most of the money part is up to me. And that concept is seriously hard to grasp. I get dizzy just thinking about it and no, it isn't from the copious amounts of gatorade I've been guzzling. (Sorry, bad joke in the midst of a serious discussion.)

I have to admit: before I really stood back and analyzed my situation, I had a difficult time holding back resentment for my parents. I know that they have always worked their hardest to provide for me and I know that I am a priority to them, no matter how much it seems that they can't wait to push me away. But I couldn't help thinking: Why didn't they make better choices? Why didn't they save more money? Why didn't they fulfill their responsibilities as parents?! But that's just it. They did. If they hadn't taught me how to be an independent person, then I wouldn't be spending my free time researching federal aid forms, finding scholarships, and actually caring HARDCORE about my future. I have just come to terms with exactly how thankful I am that I'm in this place right now. I am becoming an independent person, and, as hard as it is for me to sit down and realize that the right college for me might not be my dream college, I can still make a dream out of the future I'm making for myself.

And I'm EXCITED. I can't wait to go to [insert name of college here]. It's a great school, I'm going to meet new and amazing people, and I'm going to just stuff knowledge into my skull. And I'm truly thankful that I will end up living fairly close to my parents. Because no matter how much I mature and grow, I'm still gonna need my parents to calm down my often frantic OCD, to hug me when I'm feeling down, to give me a smile and a reassuring thumbs up, and to support me. Because a parent's true role is to guide and support their children. It's my life, and my parents aren't swaying me in any particular direction. They aren't trying to convince me to go to community college, or to go to the school they attended. They're supporting me. And I can't thank them enough.

I WOVE YOU MOM, TONY, DAD, AND BECCI!

-Natalie

*COMING UP NEXT: WHAT MAJOR WILL SHE CHOOSE? DUH DUH DUHHHHHHH*

A/N: See my mom's response to this post here.

God, That's Good. TV.

2010-07-11T17:03:00.000-07:00

Each summer for the past few years it seems like my summer has been full of one show or another. Last year it was Buffy and Angel, this year it's Wildfire and Dexter. Now Buffy and Angel may make sense together, but Wildfire and Dexter? A show about a bada** jockey and then one about a serial killer in Miami? They may not go together well, but they both suit me just fine. For those Wildfire fans, I am team Krunior, and my favorite character besides Junior is Todd. Those who haven't seen Wildfire, don't simply dismiss it as ABC Family crap about some "ponies on a farm". And if you are going to deem it as crap, at least try watching it. Last summer I really didn't want to give Buffy a try, but look where I am now!

I'm not going to have a free minute all week so I had better stop blogging and get my fill of TV while I can! I was going to apologize about the brief length of this post, but I'm thinking no one is really complaining about me not talking more. It's a rare occurrence, so enjoy it while you have it.

Ta Ta

-Natalie

A Thorough Analysis of Important Things

2010-07-08T13:33:00.000-07:00

When I look at the photo to the left of this post, my mind starts buzzing like a plethora of chainsaws about to cut down some Christmas trees. Weird simile aside, this photo makes me feel happy, curious, and excited. Shall I explain? Let's just analyze this photo. Posted on twitpic.com by Nathan Fillion (BTVS, Firefly, Dr. Horrible, Castle, etc.), this photo features Alan Tudyk, Adam Baldwin, Nathan Fillion, and of course Joss Whedon. First, I'm thinking WHAT IS THIS? A FIREFLY REUNION? ARE THEY SHOOTING A MOVIE OR SOMETHING? But then I look a little closer. They aren't in costume, Fillion is wearing a watch, Tudyk some sort of grey do-rag, and Baldwin has on a Los Angeles sweatshirt with what looks like a crown of thorns on his head. Next I move to the setting. It looks like the outdoors because of the obvious flower near Fillion and the branch that Joss "the Monkey/Christopher Columbus" Whedon is hanging off of. But there's a wall behind Baldwin. So I'm right back to square one as it looks to me like a set. Are they rehearsing? Visiting the Warehouse 13 set where Jewel Staite and Sean Maher filmed their episode of the show? Hanging out at Whedon's Pandora look-alike house? And why are they staring up at something? Is Neil Patrick Harris stuck in some Devil's Snare above them? Now I'm just grasping at straws.

So, that "analysis" of the photo should have explained my curiosity and excitedness. But why am I happy? Because whatever the heck they're doing, they're doing it together and it looks like fun. If you know what they are doing you may leave me a comment explaining. Or you can let me wonder. Because sometimes it's more fun to be curious and investigate like the Ghost Whisperer (I have never actually seen the show so I am not sure if she investigates or not, but I would assume that it is a possibility so there you go).

"Devil's Snare, Devil's Snare. It's deadly fun...but will sulk in the sun! That's it! Devil's Snare hates sunlight!"

-Natalie

IT'S MY BLOGIVERSARY!

2010-06-25T13:26:00.000-07:00

On this day last year I wrote my first blog post! I know, I know, you're impressed. So, I've decided to inform you of some of the momentous things that happened this year to ME. Ready?

In July 2009, thanks to my dear friend Helen Bradley, I became obsessed with Joss Whedon. Since then I have watched all 7 seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, all 5 seasons of Angel, Firefly, Serenity, Dollhouse season 1, and Doctor Horrible's Sing Along Blog. Also, the most fabulous episode of Glee ever created, Dream On. Joss is truly the definition of genius.

In August 2009 I met Kellan Lutz. He was verrrry nice, charming, and of course extremely attractive. He is the first celebrity I have ever met, thus, I consider this an important moment. (Shut up you people who don't care about famous people! It was a big deal!)

In January I dropped out of the International Baccalaureate program. To those who are not aware, it is a hellish thing that kills you with it's awfulness. Picture a jackal viciously murdering a meerkat. That's what it is. But really, the experience taught me that I can make big decisions that turn out in my favor with few outside influences.

In March I went to Washington D.C. The entire time I felt like I was Ben Gates. Plus, I had the best vegetable tempura in the world.

In May I watched the Lost series finale. This was a wrap up to my teen years. I started watching Lost in seventh grade and the finale of this amazing show was like, well, wasn't like, it was, THE END.

Throughout this year I have learned one very important lessons. The first being that sometimes a filter for your mouth is beneficial. Secondly, you shouldn't be afraid to speak your mind. Those seem kind of contradicting, I know. So let me add that you shouldn't be afraid to speak your mind. Just not ALL THE TIME.

*declares in an announcery voice* "THIS CONCLUDES NATALIE'S BLOGIVERSARY BLOG POST. PLEASE SEND HER BROCCOLI CHEDDAR SOUP!"

Let's see if I can keep this up for another year.

-Natalie

Bacon to be Sizzled.

2010-06-23T20:30:00.000-07:00

I feel pretty darn awful about not having blogged in awhile. Recently my mother has gotten a blog and every time I see her typing away with her deep thoughts I am all "I should be doing that". Instead I muster up some excuse about either A) being tired because I have had to wake up at 6 am every morning for the past two weeks to go to summer school B) needing to work on my US Government summer homework, or C) being too into Pretty Little Liars that nothing could possible arouse me from the hypnotized state I am in (that show is seriously addicting). Choices A and B both have issues. Firstly, it is quite ignorant for me to say I am tired when my mother works longer than I do and wakes up at the same time. Secondly, I usually am not working on Government homework, but am instead delving deep into choice C.

So, let me get to the point and just probe out there on these vast interwebs and provide you with some food for thought. I will call this "bacon to be sizzled" because I like that better. I really just like the word SIZZLED. I do apologize if you are reading this and you are a vegetarian and the description of pig meat being cooked offends you; I simply couldn't think of a better one. Please provide me with one if you see fit.

Let me actually attempt to get to the point now. Today, I have encountered two different sets of humans. One set is of the variety that goes to your high school and will throw an empty box of Trojans at your car after you have so decently let them merge in front of you. The second type is a random stranger that will go out of his way to move his car so that you can avoid getting a ticket. So which action outweighs? Does one good action counteract all bad ones? Or is there some sort of ratio? For example do 2 crappy events make the one good one nill? Or does the one nice person make the bad ones zilch? I know you like my wordage, people.

So, for the benefit of myself, and for yourself (I always feel that thinking about something for the purpose of something else actually tends to help me as well, if that makes any semblance of sense) please leave me a comment on either my twitter, facebook, or preferably on this blog to let me know what YOU think about this subject.

"Oh and btdubs..." -Chemistry teacher extraordinaire, Steve Appier.

-Natalie

THE PRINCE OF PERSIA: THE MUMMY BUT DIFFERENT

2010-05-31T17:10:00.000-07:00

As my favorite movie of all time is The Mummy, I throughly enjoyed Prince of Persia. Actually, I loved it. I haven't ever played the video game it is supposedly based on or anything, so I am not sure how to compare it to that, but Jake Gyllenhaal was exceedingly attractive and Aladdinish and it had just the right touches of humor, action, and romance. Jake, as Dastan, did some excellent parkour and had some unique surfer hair that I enjoyed looking at. Gemma Arterton, who played the Princess Tamina, is absolutely gorgeous, and acted beautifully. The story was decent and the special effects and cinematography were well done. Let me just say that lately I haven't been purchasing many movies (Netflix is a miracle) but I will most certainly be purchasing this film. Not because I think it is the best film ever made, but because I liked watching it. Yes, I had a few problems with the plot. One example being that throughout the entire film many characters said that the Apocalypse would happen if certain things occurred, and when these certain things occurred, NO APOCALYPSE. Secondly, one of the things I like most about The Mummy is the history that is involved. I didn't really get so much Persian History in this film and I think there could have been room for some. Also, I think it could have been funnier- Alfred Molina was pretty much the only comic relief in the entire film. OSTRICHES! Still, looking at it from a debater's perspective, the benefits of seeing the movie (I will restate: humor, action, romance, etc.) far outweigh the disadvantages. In conclusion, if you enjoy The Mummy and other movies like that (see also: The Librarian, Stardust, National Treasure) I believe that you may like this one as well.

On a fairly unrelated topic, I have been concentrating much of my time, money, and effort into get a TAN. Yes, this is vain, risky, and dumb, but I ask you to ask the sun to not give me cancer anyway.

"What is a place like me doing in a girl like this?"- Evie (The Mummy)

-Natalie

MY HUG BUCKET

2010-05-16T16:45:00.000-07:00

Towards the end of April, Hank Green of the Vlogbrothers made a video (CLICKY FOR DA LINKY) in which he discussed who is in his "Hug Bucket". He explained the Hug Bucket to be the bucket where your hugs go into. He said that everyone wants to hug certain people before they, well, die. This is a bigger deal than just meeting someone famous. For example, I met the very attractive Kellan Lutz, but I was unable to hug him. I have a feeling that I would have been arrested if I had attempted to. So the Hug Bucket is kind of like a bucket list for people that you really want to get close to. So, here are just a few of the people, both fictional and real, that I would like to hug.

1. Patricia Belcher, otherwise known as Caroline Julian (see also: Sue Sylvester), the tough, hardcore prosecutor on Bones, seems like the ideal candidate to reside in my bucket of hugs. I would adore cracking that tough exterior and slapping her with a warrent. For a hug! Okay, bad joke, Natalie.

2. Jason Alexander: Really his character from the Cinderella movie with Brandy, Lionel. Lionel is constantly frustrated with the inane antics of the prince and his parents, Whoopi Goldberg and Victor Garber. I would like to relieve some of his weighty burden with a massive hug. I think he would appreciate that.

3. Josh Groban: He is adorable and his voice is more stirring than Anton Yelchin with a spoon and a pot of macaroni. Bad Joke O-Meter: 2.

4. Joss Whedon: It's friggin Joss Whedon. 'Nuff said.

5. Molly Weasley: It doesn't even need to be Julie Walters, I just want to hug the character. She is warm and kind and probably smells good because she cooks all the time. That there just sounds pleasant to me.

6. Angus T. Jones: This guy, better known for his role as Jake Harper, or The Kid from Two and a Half Men, is just charming. Yes, he eats a lot, and is kind of gross, but there is something to be said for his brutal honesty. Plus, he was a really cute kid.

For clarification purposes, there are obviously more people on this planet that I would be willing to hug than just those I have included on this list. These are just the ones that were floating around in my brain at the time I decided to write this. But you are probably not dumb, so you have probably already ascertained this.

And I just realized what the hugging meerkat picture looks like. Oh, well.

"Natalie, you're such a slippery, seductive otter."

-Natalie

Good News is Good News/ Meerkat Robots are FUN

2010-05-01T19:37:00.000-07:00

This has been a fairly good week. I have become a part of the robotics team at my school, got accepted into a very choosy organization, became the secretary and treasurer of la Société Honoraire de Français, and ate some bomb diggity salmon. Oh wait, you are wondering why I have joined the robotics team? Well, I can answer that! Because it has nice people, is actually open to suggestions I have to offer, and is absolutely FUN (Unlike something else I didn't get accepted into this week *cough Link cough*. Finally I am hanging out with people that understand my Joss Whedon references! BONUS! And no, I am not building robots like Warren from Buffy. I am (currently) working on the various sites management/social media aspect of the team. Huzzah!

Unrelated hugging meerkats interlude: http://bit.ly/azL722

On a similarish subject, today I found out that I was accepted to be a part of the Rachel Alexandra Girls Grant Project. I will be on a committee that will choose which organizations in Kansas City deserve grant money. This is an amazing opportunity that I may or may not keep you updated about. I will if anything humorous occurs at the meetings but if nothing does, you may not hear about this again unless you follow me on twitter. Of course, humorous happenings seem to follow me around, so you will probably be filled in here.

I am going to skip the French and salmon things because they pretty much explain themselves. I would just like to add that they were both delicious. The French one was particularly tasty because I got to eat a croissant.

''Looking back at the dress [Lady GaGa] wore to that awards show, I don't think she possesses any protruding equipment.'' -Niko (coincidentally, a member of the robotics team)

-Natalie

In hindsight, perhaps the cat in the car was a bad idea.

2010-04-07T18:43:00.000-07:00

Today, I experienced some weird happenings. For instance, I took my fat, probably-the-fattest-cat-you've-ever-seen-in-your-gosh-darn-life-cat, for a ride in the van. In trying to get his attention so he would stop howling like a drowning meerkat, I threw my dad's new powder blue blazer at him. Not a good idea. My cat, Caesar, peed on it. The footage of my tub-of-lard cat howling in the back of the van just might be the next viral video on YouTube. You never know. In other news, I have been recently hanging out with a girl (I will here refer to her as Coxie) that is obsessed with the Jonas Brothers. Now, this is more than fine with me. Because the plus side of hanging out with someone whose interests are akin to those of a 13 year old is that she talks about iCarly and Scooby Doo with me. Love you, Coxie!

April is National Poetry month, so in honor of the occasion I have decided to award you all with a story that happened today in my writing class. Names have been changed to protect the identities and reputations of those involved.

I have this writing class fifth hour, which is the hour that we have lunch. I have second lunch, which means that the period is split up into two 45 minute blocks with a 30 minute lunch in the middle. The first half of class we were sharing our poems that we had prepared for the poetry slam. One student, JP, shared an intense and moving look at an incident that had happened in his life. It is an extremely serious and life altering event concerning the subjects of murder and suicide. This type of thing is just not brought up everyday and the members of the class were stupefied to the point of asking what was probably too many questions in hindsight. Soon, though, the lunch bell rang and we were off to munch on Cheez-Its. Well, I was. When I returned to class a girl, Sarah, was sitting in her desk. I could've sworn that she hadn't been there during the other half of class. Apparently, Ms. Teachy (hehe punny), thought the same thing. She asked Sarah if she had been there before. Sarah assured us that she had. The conversation went something like this:

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Ms T: "Were you really there?"

Sarah: "I have been at school all day!"

Ms T: "Okay..."

Sarah: "I swear I have been at school all day!"

Ms T: "So you remember JP's poem?"

Sarah: "Um...I think so..I know we were reading our slam poems today in class."

Ms T: "There's no way you were there. You would have remembered."

Sarah: "Oh...well I wasn't in class before. Did I say that? I was at lunch. With my fiancee."

Ms T: "Ah.....probably not the best decision."

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Let me just say that Sarah is a sophomore. Makes it more interesting doesn't it? Anyway, this story isn't necessarily funny, nor did I probably tell it as well as it should have been, but I was struck by the absolute ridiculousness of this situation. And let me commend JP--your poem was fantastic. It truly struck me, all of us really, and I am proud that I was present to witness you sharing this part of yourself. Let me also say that I am not trying to make fun of "Sarah" at all, I'm just commenting on how she handled the situation. It's great that she has found her, as another classmate would say, "soul-partner", at such a young age.

On a non-related-in-any-way-note, using the word hindsight made me think of something that I read today in Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier. In the novel, a girl named, Ada decides that she wants to know her future. A neighbor tells her that she can see what her future holds by looking in a mirror and then looking through the mirror behind herself into the water of a well ( def not complicated at all). So she does it and now I want to as well.

Anyone know where I can find a well?

-Natalie

DRAMA LLAMA

2010-04-01T17:24:00.000-07:00

HAPPY APRIL FOOL'S DAY, MINIONS! Besides lying to this crazy chicka at my school about male genitalia, my attempts at cracking myself up at other people's expenses today have failed. I actually tried to tape the sink nozzle down to spray my mom, but ended up forgetting that I had done that and using the sink before she even got home. Blah blah blah I'm-an-awkward-dork-blah blah...

Sooooo, I reached 200 followers on Twitter CUS I'M SOOOOAHHHH FAMOUS...(sarcasm intended. I always feel like I have to specify that so I don't seem like a senseless diva). Anyways, this is a interesting time for this because I have now had my Twitter account for almost a year. I got it in April of last year after I realized that if Keke Palmer had one then I had better get one too. You think I'm joking don't you?

Going on with this choppy little whatever-this-is, I wrote this bit in my writing class a week or so ago, and have just today made all of the final changes. Enjoy, hate, comment, whatever. But we all know what I like to do with haters....

Example from my Honesty Box on Facebook: "Your blog is really stupid. You're just an internet poser who is trying to be cool by "blogging" and obsessing over Twilight. (Which by the way sucks)". My answer: "Thank you! I love hearing opinions about me and feedback about my blog. And I understand why you commented negatively. Obviously your life is sucking right now and you need an upper. So if by insulting me your morale is improving then DO IT (:"

Yeah, I think we all know how I can be sometimes...the words insane, obnoxious, weird, awkward, and b***hy come to mind. Some Tyra-like person might say, "embrace your flaws, sista!" But honestly, I don't really consider these flaws. Because, although I could perhaps be a tad less crazy sometimes, I wouldn't be me without these qualities. Now, I have gotten quite a few hate comments and I have learned that if YOU are proud of what you do, then those things that people say to you just help you love others more. You realize that what they are saying is an insecurity within themselves that they feel that they can push onto someone else because the media channel that they are saying the crap on is anonymous. I get this and have learned to let some things go. I focus on putting myself in their place--because maybe they had a crappy day, maybe I inadvertently did something to offend them, and maybe wherever they are commenting is their only outlet for emotional release. I am not saying that hating is a good thing, but you've gotta let it out somehow. Personally, I prefer having profound conversations with my dog that usually end up with me bawling.

*shuffles virtual papers* *removes poem from stack*

------------------------------------------------

"Drama"

Our unfenced country

Is bog that keeps crusting

Between the sights of the sun

Like a horse

That gallops nowhere

With a coat of dusty dun

A lottery

Of lonely people

Never claimed or won

The fortunate

Yet ignorant

Who’ve never had to run

The only thief

Invited

He’s never pulled a gun

Lovers not desperate

Nor star-crossed

Their story is just a pun

Simple, unfettered

Uninteresting

Like a chaste nun

Drama may be

Burdening

But at least it’s fun

---------------------------------------------

blah blah insert quote here blah

-Natalie

People I LOVE Today!

2010-03-31T14:43:00.000-07:00

I am in an extremely good mood today! Probably from all the Lucky Charms and nail polish fumes. Anyways, I want to spread the love and tell you about my favorite people today.

1. My after-school-hood-sitting-gang: Emily, Natalie B, Celeste and I sit on the hood of Natalie's car for half an hour after school and have some of the most hilarious conversations every single day. LOVE YOU GUYS.

Follow them on Twitter!

Nat B: www.twitter.com/fenderbender05

Emily: www.twitter.com/morrisborris

Celeste: www.twitter.com/celestial11

2. wordsmithsonian on http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2069738/wordsmithsonian: This is one of my favorite fanfiction authors. Even if you are not into fanfiction (You don't know till ya try it!) you can appreciate this author's impressive skill.

3. Nordstrom's: Thank you, Nordstrom's for this deliciously amazing dress. I love you for it. http://bit.ly/bKJ8b9

4. Nathan Fillion: Honestly, Castle is not a super-great show. It's trying to be Bones, and it doesn't compare. But I have started watching it and I will continue. You might ask me: "Why on earth would you watch a kinda crappy show, Natalie?" Answer: Nathan Fillion is the King of the World. End of discussion. Follow the KING OF THE WORLD: www.twitter.com/nathanfillion

5. Karl Schroeder: I gave you your King of the World now let me introduce you to the King of the Nerds: Mr. Karl Schroeder. The amazing (sarcasm intended) author of Ventus, should be recognized for his epic science fiction writing skillz. If you really want to (I don't recommend it) check out his blog: http://www.kschroeder.com/weblog

"If you are sayin' you ain't never seen my tatt- I'm sayin' you ain't no Browncoat. Go Hulu Firefly, episode Trash." -Twitter message from @NathanFillion

-Natalie

VENTUSY CHEESEBALLEDNESS

2010-03-26T16:59:00.000-07:00

I was talking to myself today, as per normal, and I told myself that I should blog. And myself listened. Below is something I wrote today in my writing class. We were given a list of random words chosen from the book Ventus ( An epic science fiction novel) to fit into a piece. Although it has a darker tone than I usually use, I really like it and hope that you do to (I am a cheeseball, I know).

---------------------------------------------

"Purgatory"

You may be surprised to see the souls of the dead taking form. They are visible, but their shape is unknown. The gray hands of smoke caress their potential features. They are speaking. Frantic whispers compete to tell of once vital things – of Gods, and Questions, of Complications, and Obsessions. Their voices, humming like flies over a corpse, are hurried, for not often does a human come to lend an ear to their plight. They must be heard – but they cannot be. Voices run together, over one another, marring their soft words. You just stand there, now not attempting to make out their unintelligible tributes. They are eternal laborers, plowing their farms of doomed hope. Hope for you. It matters not who you are, or who they are even. They want only to be heard – to be cared for by another soul. They want it so badly that they cannot, like hostages sometimes do with their keepers, form any sort of bond within each other. They are chained together only by their uniform hope that someone will hear them. They are like stubborn elders – so entirely focused on one thought that their ways cannot be altered. Unlike an evolving infant, they are denied any form of mental expansion.

Your time here is almost up and you wait patiently to be released from this panicked wasteland. No, you cannot hear their words, but you know what they are trying to tell you.

“I tried. “

-----------------------------------------

"DOUBLE STICKER FRIDAY!"

-Natalie

TODAY A HERO WAS BORN

2010-03-11T17:36:00.000-08:00

Today, 21 years ago, Anton Yelchin was born. I *almost* forgot. Shun me. Please shun me. I am so ashamed. But I must overcome my sadness to celebrate the wonder that is Anton. Why don't you celebrate with us (by "us" I mean Anton and I of course) by checking out my Anton Yelchin playlist. Enjoy! I know I will.

Annnnnd...I cannot choose just one wrap up quote. So I have chosen three. Choose your favorite.

"I can do zat! I can do zat!" (Star Trek)

"Viagra! Virgin! Vino! Vagabond! Vagina!" (Charlie Bartlett)

"I really see no reason in not being level headed." (ACTUAL Anton quote)

-Natalie

AN: Anton and I obviously have a lot in common. I mean, I love being level headed too....Well, we'll have to work on that.

My Top 10..Erg...11.. Whedon Characters

2010-03-08T15:55:00.000-08:00

Let me just tell you right away: Buffy won't be on this list. Yeah, she's BUFFY, but she's just not, personally, the most interesting. So here goes:

11: Lorne (Angel): Lorny adds a bit of magic and charm to every scene. RIP Andy Hallett.

10. Jayne Cobb (Firefly): I must have my comic relief, as you will see from the rest of my list. Jayne is hilarious, but also has a bit of a dark side, which provides a depth to his character. I also love Adam Baldwin (www.twitter.com/adamsbaldwin) as Casey in Chuck. Adam Baldwin IS John Casey, BEAST OF THE WORLD.

9. Rupert Giles (BTVS): What can I say? He's sweet, adorable, and how bout that episode with him and Joyce? GIT SOME GILES! Although I wish he had better taste in women when it comes to Jenny Calendar (she would be #1 on my list of worst characters) hooking up with Joyce was an ace move.

8. Wesley Wyndam-Pryce (BTVS/Angel): I much prefer the post-Buffy Wes. I always cry for him in Season 5 of Angel when he finally gets Fred and then...ILLYRIA DOOM. ): I am fairly sure that the fact that Alexis Denisof is married to Alyson Hannigan (Denisof) and that they have a BEAUTIFUL BABY is around 25 percent of the reason that I like Wes so much.

7. Anya Jenkins: BUNNIES BUNNIES IT MUST BE BUNNIES! Love Anya. But poor girl! Can't she catch a break? Buffy closer left me SHOCKED. Joss' swift killings of major characters is part of what he is known for, but nevertheless, I was brokenhearted. Anya and Xander may not be perfect, but they are perfect for each other. Feel free to awwwww. *awwws at self*

6. Cordy Chase (BTVS/Angel): Again, I prefer the Angel-version of Cordy. I used to be a Buffy/Angel girl, but as Cordelia and Angel's relationship progressed, I became a Cordy/Angel girl! I think how her character evolves, but still keeps the major parts of her personality was a major stroke of genius on the part of David Greenwalt and Joss.

5. Malcolm Reynolds (Firefly): Who doesn't love Mal? He is the man of everyone's dreams (even guys! ADMIT IT), plus we got to see his patoot in an episode! If that's not enough to make you appreciate the, again I will use this word, GENIUS, that is Firefly, then I couldn't tell you what would. Follow Nathan Fillion on Twitter: www.twitter.com/nathanfillion. He and Simon Pegg have awesome Star Trek/Serenity duels. Get in there.

4. Spike/Randy Giles (BTVS/Angel): Spike is my favorite of Buffy's, I will call them LOVERS, and must make this list. Everyone knows why he is so amazing, thus, I will not explain my reasoning. It is surely the same as yours. Hehe Randy Giles.

3. Dr. Horrible (Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog): Alrighty, so I LOVE LOVE LOVE Neil Patrick Harris. He comes in as #2 on my favorite actors of all time, with only Anton Yelchin beating him. And THAT, my friends, is saying something. Dr. Horrible is almost as AMAZING as NPH, thus, he has to come up fairly high on this list. Or low. Whatever. Follow NPH: www.twitter.com/ActuallyNPH.

2. Harmony (BTVS/Angel): You can't possibly be surprised. As far as comic relief comes, Harm is right up there. I AGAIN, like her in Angel far more than in Buffy. One of my favorite episodes of all is the Harmony centric episode in Angel S5...and...not gonna look up the episode name. (:

1. Andrew! (BTVS): Episode 16 of Buffy Season 7, Storyteller, is what truly made me an Andrew fan. Watch it! It is insanely funny, yet is a brilliant, almost outside look into the lives of the Scoobies, at an extremely climatic time of the show. Andrew is truly kindhearted, sweet, funny, and caring. My #1 pick couldn't be anyone other than the fabulous Andrew. Follow Tom Lenk on Twitter: www.twitter.com/tomlenk.

"Urrh Arg" (Mutant Enemy)

-Natalie

Oh, Natalie, YOU ARE SO POEMY.

2010-02-26T08:57:00.000-08:00

It's time for one of my POEMS! The first two lines of this work of genius (just kidding) are borrowed from Jim Henson's Cantus Fraggle - enjoy!

"A Night Adventure"

Well, when the path is steep and stony
And the night is all around
The possibilities are endless
It's a world without a bound

You could swim in the mountains
Or climb up the sea
Every door is open
There's no need for a key

You could take a peek in Pandora's Box
Without any risk of danger
You could talk to all the world at once
No one is a stranger

You could dance in cerulean sunbeams
Or sail on a ship made of glass
You could jump in piles of ice cream
A giant Neapolitan mass

You could fly with dolphins
Or float in the breeze
Worry, anger, guilt - they're gone
Your mind can be at ease

All the world's a spotlit stage
For you to go and play on
Envision life like Harold
With his magic purple crayon

What it is possible to imagine
Will never disappear
The dawn will come eventually
But don't waste time on fear

You'll have time again tomorrow night
For this wild fun
But for now open your tired eyes
This adventure's done

Thank you all for reading! I won't leave you with just that, though. Anyone been watching the Olympics? No?! Then check out this amazing coverage by Michael Buckley: http://www.youtube.com/user/bucknews?blend=2&ob=1. Also, watch the Ice Dancing. It is superb.

In the words of Buck, "Oh to be a fly on my brain".

-Natalie

"OH NANCY!"

2010-02-25T10:35:00.000-08:00

I used to read a whole lot. I would gobble up vast amounts of books in very little time. But it seems in the past year or so I have just not been very into reading. TV, at this point in my life, is more entertaining. Someone needs to take the blame for this crisis and I have placed that blame on two separate entities. #1: SCHOOL. When I am forced to spend most of my free time reading things that I don't choose, it can be difficult to actually start to read something on my own. #2: YouTube. Nuf said. Now, I realize that I sound shallow and quite frankly DUMB, so I have decided to get on this problem and try to change it. I thought I would share some of my favorite childhood books to GET IN THE MOOD. Each of these books will be given an adjective so ya'll know how good they are. (: So folks, here they are.

#1: The Nancy Drew Mysteries by Carolyn Keene. I am not kidding. These books made up my childhood, I own them all, and I think that anyone who reads them (there are 56, so you had better get on that) will be a better person for it. I learned how to read from these books, and I believe that my vocabulary is more well developed than most people (not to toot my own horn) because of them. My personal favorite is the Secret of the Golden Pavilion. Yes, this post is about books, but you might as well check out the 1970s TV show as well starring Pamela Sue Martin as well as Parker Stevenson and Shaun Cassidy as the Frank and Joe Hardy. Oh, the word is....GROOVY.

#2: Famous Dead People: Henry VIII and His Chopping Block by Alan MacDonald. I have always loved Tudor history, and this book is one of the most hilarious and entertaining ones I have ever read. It is almost entirely compromised of comic strip-like illustrations that are surprisingly accurate. NIFTY

#3: The Great Picture Robbery by Leon A. Harris. This is about a mouse who lives in the Louvre who prevents the Mona Lisa from being stolen by scary people. There are not enough positive words to describe this book so I will just stick with MARVELOUS.

#4: Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants by Dave Pilkey. Most kids at some time have read these books, no matter what gender and that is because they are HILARIOUS. The best part of this book is when you can match up your name to the list of weird words to see what your Poopypants-given name is. Mine: Zippy Potty Biscuits.

#5: The Boxcar Children: The Mystery Bookstore by Gertrude Chandler Warner. STELLAR. Violet, Henry, Jessie, and Benny, go to New Orleans where they help to save a mystery bookstore. I loved this book because it combined my love of mystery books with New Orleans, where I was born. My favorite scene is where they go to Cafe du Monde and eat beinets. It reminds me of when Fred eats them in Scooby Doo on Zombie Island and gets a powdered sugar moustache...anyone, anyone?

#6: The Doll People by Ann M. Martin and Laura Godwin illustrated by Brian Selznick. Again, the reason that I loved this book is because I could connect it to something in my own life, this time my...you guessed it...DOLL HOUSE. Coincidentally, my favorite book of all time, the Invention of Hugo Cabret, is written and illustrated by Brian Selznick! Anyways, I give the Doll People a ZESTY.

Alright, even though there are many other books that could blab about, this is getting too long so I must shove off. One last thing, this is my favorite person of the week-----> www.youtube.com/KieraCass for her BOOK REVIEWS. YAY FOR STICKING ON THEME!

"How well you understand a mouse." (The Great Picture Robbery)

-Natalie

one of those darn facebook things

2010-02-07T14:13:00.000-08:00

You know when someone tags you in a note on Facebook that is like a music thing? I know, try and be more vague, Natalie. I'm going to assume that you know what I am talking about. Well, I am going to do one of these things because it sounds fun. Oh and btdubs, I stole this idea from Katy. I suppose I'll credit her so she doesn't blow a gasket or something. ( I have no idea what a gasket is. I think it's a part for a washing machine or a car maybe.) Here's her blog: http://www.karatetentacles.blogspot.com/. Okay, so here's how it is supposed to work:

Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle.
Step 2: Post the first line (unless the first line reveals the song title) from the first 10 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 3: After someone correctly guesses both the artist and song title, put a line through it. (Not going to do this)
Step 4: If you like the game, post your own.
Note: No googling them to find the answer ...that's cheating. (I don't consider this cheating. Go ahead and google it...or BING it.)

Let's get started.

1. Alphie, now that we're friends I've decided to make you my new project...
2. Want to shout it from the mountain tops a star is born..

3. Separated and negated it seems fated we have to find out more...

4. My friends they all think that I cheated, but I didn't put my name in the cup...

5. When something's pure how can people just say we're not meant to be...

6. I'm alone above the atmosphere and no one looking up can find me here...

7. What a group of kids we've sent out into the world...

8. And now broadcast now live in front of a live studio audience from the new up-to-code WYZT studio...

9. You've got to go dig those holes with broken hands and weathered soles emancipated from all you know...

10. I'm feeling kinda strange cause of all the things you say yeah I know you're too good to believe...

Well, have a good time guessing. I hope that someone out there knows something about some of the music I listen to. Sticking with the theme, I will post the answers on www.facebook.com/nkparker.

*waves emphatically*

-Natalie

"R.J. Benson's Bucketful of Dreams"

2010-02-05T13:59:00.000-08:00

Hey folks, so I read the poem from my last blog post aloud today and got surprisingly good reviews so thanks for those of you that read it! This next piece I read in class today as well. It is about a movie producer named Radcliffe Jerome Benson. Now, sharing this kind of stuff is kinda weird for me but this is my blog so I am going to do whatever I friggin want to do! OKAY?!

"R.J. Benson's Bucketful of Dreams"

R.J. was respected. He wasn't denied anything, by anyone. If he wanted 70 gallons of lukewarm Fanta as his ocean then have it he would. If he wanted Mario Lopez to play his female lead then in a dress would Mario be. One might think that it was his overwhelmingly domineering presence that gained him this respect, but he did not possess such a disposition. R.J. was a sweet man. He was kind, calm, and breezy. He and would often ask the Kraft Service cart workers about their lives and how their pets faired. R.J.'s qualities were special, not usual for a producer to have, but he had them. Money mattered not to him, because he usually had none. As soon as he make a bucketful from his latest production, he would invest it in another fantastical venture. He lived in tapered jeans thats heyday was in the 90s and a red sweatshirt from a college he did not attend. R.J. was simple, but his ideas were not. He watched his crew scrambling about to make his visions come alive. They blew up gargantuan magenta ballons with large helium tanks, scooped up plastic packages of licorice and lined truck beds with the skinny, black pieces. They were creating something they knew not of, but that R.J. recognized exactly. It was from his mind.

PLEASE DON'T COPY THIS. (Not that you'd want to.)

La De Da

-Natalie

LOST IS BOSS

2010-02-03T18:37:00.000-08:00

Inspired by last night's season 6 premiere of Lost (which was INSANE btdubs), I wrote a poem loosely based on Dr. Jack Shephard. Losties know that in the pilot episode, Jack tells Kate a story about how he accidently cut this girl's spinal sack thingy during surgery and then composed himself and sewed the girl back up. This poem is about that except without the sack thingy and unlike Jack, a spinal surgeon, Dr. Grayson Hart (the subject of this poem) is a cardiologist. Yes, I know I'm punny. WARNING: This is kinda cheesy and not my normal thing, but attempt to enjoy anyway. If you wanna laugh, go ahead.

"The Struggle of Dr. Hart"

What is it about my life
That consumes me with strife
I am kept wondering
If I will ever stop blundering
This fight inside
makes me want to hide
I try to do my best
When opening a chest
I must always be brave
In order to save
But I will err
And I must bear
Bad news

My heart must choose
Or God knows I will lose
Shall I say goodbye
And let someone else try
Or should I stay
To clear up the fray

I count to five
To keep her alive
I take my knife
I save a life

I embrace your jeers!

-Natalie

Equationy Bloggy

2010-02-02T16:04:00.000-08:00

I have so much to talk about I am going to put this blog in equation format to cut down the size. In case you were unaware, equation format is where I blog using equations to explain stuff. As I am not too skilled at math, I am not too skilled at blogging in equation format. Oh well, hope it is mildly understandable for the 2 people that will actually read this.

Apprehension + Exhileration + Insanity = Lost is on TONIGHT

Nerds (the candy) + Reese's + Goldfish (the cracker-like snack) + Charlie Bartlett = my AHMAZING afternoon

Akwardness + Okayness + Gold Eyeshadow + Ehhhhhh = my birthday party with friends

Fun + Macaroni + Love = my birthday party with family

Red Robin + Chuck + Scarlett Fever = My ACTUAL birthday

Anton + Baby Meerkat = Snowglobe

Anton/Meerkat Snowglobe = AHMAZING GIFT

Thank you all for your birthday wishes, gifts, and love! I love you guys. For some reason I envision myself saying "I love you guys" with a British accent. I dunno why.

Anyways,

Natalie

An Anton Yelchin Rant

2010-01-20T18:18:00.000-08:00

I dunno if anyone else in the world has heard about the movie Fierce People. It has a whole bunch of big actors including Kristen Stewart and my fiancee, Anton Yelchin (just kidding...that is, unless he would be okay with that..?) Now I have known about this film for a while now. Because I know about everything that Anton has done (This is not an overstatement. Check out my YouTube playlist that is not affiliated with Celeste Rinner in any way: http://bit.ly/6HspGd) I knew that this movie featured Anton and KStew and the basic premise (ya can find that here, folks: http://bit.ly/6jmlmV). What I was unaware of (and here is where the title of this post comes in) is that Kristen and Anton make out. Big time. Multiple times. I am not positive why I have such a strong reaction to this particular role of Anton's. He is a superior actor and I like KStew okay too. Anton has been in other roles where kissing has been involved (Charlie Bartlett, Alpha Dog...etc.) Gah it must just be KStew. Perhaps I have a particular attachment to other roles SHE has been in...hmmm...what could that be... I DUNNO! *sarcasm intended* I am simply trying to work out the psychological reasoning for why my weird brain would react this way. No answer right now. Let me just make up a moral for this thing to try and salvage some of my credibility.

The moral of this rant is that Anton Yelchin is an amazing actor. Gah, I feel like such a creeper. I don't know why, most of my posts are this "attached" right? You tell me, and while you are doing so check out Anton Yelchin in Fierce People.

You know, maybe I should not post this. It is kinda dumb. Oh well, I'll just be like Ann Coulter and not hold back...ANYTHING.

My obsessions are increasing at an alarming rate I have noticed.

-Natalie

People I Like Today #3

2010-01-17T12:24:00.000-08:00

1. Celeste Rinner: For FINALLY bringing me the second Glee CD.

2. Falletron: For having amazing ideas and an amazinger accent. www.youtube.com/falletron and www.twitter.com/falletron.

3. Neil Gaimon and Amanda Palmer: For being the most adorable couple ever. Congrats guys! I know you will never read this but it's the thought, right?

. Gale Beggy/Josh Ruben: For this: www.collegehumor.com/video:1924358.

5. Liz Calloway: This amazing woman was the voice of Odette in the Swan Princess, Jasmine, and the singing voice of Anastasia. Not kidding. What a friggin repertoire.

6. Adam Baldwin/Casey on Chuck/Jayne on Firefly: I don't even want to explain. If you have seen him in anything, you know. If you haven't then, you probably don't care. But you should.

Just saying.

-Natalie

Movie Review: The Lovely Bones

2010-01-16T15:22:00.000-08:00

Otherwise known as "I'm Gonna Take You To My Man Cave And Kill You Because I Want Your Charm Bracelet".

I'm just going to hop right in. This film was absolutely beautiful and all the actors were good. Let's just get that out of the way. I can't picture anyone other than Saoirse Ronan playing Susie and Mark Wahlberg was pretty darn swell. Buckley Salmon was the most adorable part of the entire movie and was quite skilled at painting Susan Sarandon's toe nails. Rachel Weitz did a fair job, but I of course, prefer her in The Mummy. While Stanley did reach CREEPER status, I love him too much for him to be playing such an uber creeper like Mr. Harvey. Go back to being a well-dressed fashion director, Mr. Tucci.

Let me just go ahead and describe some of my favorite scenes. *MINOR SPOILER ALERT*

1. Mr. Harvey and Len peer at each other through the windows of the dollhouse, playing a little "cat and mouse" game. It was exceedingly amusing and reminded me of (if you will refer to my past review of Little Ashes) the creeping style of Federico Garcia Lorca and Salvador Dali.

2. When Susie took over Ruth's body in order to kiss Ray. This scene was much more...for lack of a better word, normal, than it was presented in the book. It was almost sweet...*awwwws*

3. All the scenes with Buckley. Particularly the one in which he pours his oaties into his toy cement mixer.

Now for the most creeper scene in the entire film: Susie is, I believe, either in the process of dying, is dead, or is being raped. She is going through this dream sequence of running throughout her town and screaming for people that are not there. She then WAIT FOR IT opens a door, that I THOUGHT was supposed to be "the in-between" but turns out to be Mr. Harvey's muddy, bloody, bathroom. Mr. Harvey has just murdered Susie and is in the grimy bathtub with a towel over his face. If this does not sound creepy to you then you are a future Mr. Harvey.

Yes, I have read the book, as you have probably deduced, so for people who are wondering how the movie compares, the mood of the film was much akin to the book with only minor plot changes. On a deeper note, I do think the film conveyed a clear message, and I believe that it was well received by the audience. You will have to decide what that message is yourself though.

Future Mr. Harvey's who are reading my blog know this: If you EVER try to lure me into your underground corn palace of doom I will SING* you. So, if I were you, I would not try to rape and/or kill me. Also, you may see a complete album of all my Lovely Bones Creeper Pics here.

That is all.

-Natalie

*Solarplex, Instep, Nose, Groin

A Reason To Weep

2010-01-12T18:59:00.001-08:00

It is a sad day. I have been notified that Sean Maher is homosexual.

That is all.

-Natalie

People I Like Today #2

2010-01-06T16:16:00.001-08:00

1. Simon (Sean Maher) from Firefly-As a comment by one "DamnFineFilly" on a video of him on YouTube stated, "Oh good grief, it's like he's been chiseled out of marble...*drool*". Do I need to say more?

2. Ke$ha-Her new album, Animal, is seriously good. Not kidding. I don't care if you think she's unclassy because she brushes her teeth with a bottle of Jack, her music is catchy and I like it. My personal faves are "Hungover" and "Animal".

3.Doc Schiefferecke-My new PreCalc teacher, better known as THE SCHIEF-DRAGON by my friends and I, actually taught me something math-related. Ask her about her trap door. I swear, you will get an answer you will appreciate.

4. Omegle founder, Leif K Brooks: Omegle is awesome. Shout out to Angus from Australia. Perhaps someday your dream of meeting someone who is into lacrosse, water polo, punk music, and anime will come true. Alas, that is not me.

5. Geo and Chris from http://www.twilighters.org/ : I am very excited and thankful to be a part of the Twilighters team!

6. Screech from Saved By the Bell- You dress like Gumby, Screech. You do that. I like that.

7. Georgia Groome-The star of Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging did a beautiful job. I don't usually watch movies about 14 year olds with self-confidence issues, but this one I thoroughly enjoyed. I highly recommend that everyone watch this movie and read the book that it was based off of, Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging by Louise Rennison.

8. Dan-He let me plan a party at his house. Thanks Dstew. Go to http://www.dstewsfml.blogspot.com/ to see his blog.

9. My school counselor, Ms. Griffy. She let me drop out of IB and switched my entire schedule around for me. Thanks, hon.

10. The people that have been supporting of me, the IB dropout (that's NOT YOU LOGAN HELEY!): I truly appreciate you and your kind words.

Now for your random ending quote--->"I threw up on your bed." (River from Firefly)

-Natalie

Lost Fanatics Take Over My School

2010-01-04T17:15:00.000-08:00

When I was in 7th grade, I discovered the wonder that is Lost. I hurredly watched the 1st and 2nd seasons and then would stay home on Wednesday nights to stuff myself with the rest of this wondrous, amazing, show. The worst night of my life (this may be a slight hyperbole) was when our power went off. During Lost. I am not kidding. I may or may not have bawled for a while. SO WHAT?! Now back to civilized conversation. In case any of you are wondering my top three fave characters are as follows:

1. Sayid-Anyone who can stuff bamboo reeds down someone's nails while looking fairly masculine and composed deserves the #1 spot in my book (Maybe I shouldn't have explained my reasoning on that one.)
2. Daniel Faraday-He's a friggin genius AND he's sweet.
3. Dezmond-Everyone loves Dez. If you watch Lost you know why. If you don't watch it then you should and I am going to hold you in suspense so you watch it. *cackles*

ANYWAYS, back to business. Recently, with the upcoming addition of the final 6th season of Lost, some people at my school have been super into it. This, I commend. Follow in their footsteps, people. They are brave souls, who deserve your praise.

Some of my fellow Losties Twitters-
Jack: www.twitter.com/art3dee
Libby: www.twitter.com/LibsLou
Dan: www.twitter.com/Dstew52
Emily: www.twitter.com/MorrisBorris
and finally, the girl who would complain about me talking about it tout le temps:
Celeste: www.twitter.com/CelesteSTP

All five seasons of Lost can be watched at www.hulu.com/lost

"See you in another life, brother."
-Natalie

This time, perhaps someone will understand the reference.

PROJECT FOR AWESOME!

2009-12-18T15:59:00.000-08:00

Know what the Project for Awesome is? Yes? Too bad. I'm going to tell you anyway. Currently the #1 trending topic on Twitter, P4A is when all these amazing people get together and take over the internet. We do this by putting up videos on YouTube about causes and charities that we are passionate about and then commenting and rating other P4A videos. These videos get sent way to the top of the YouTube pile and then everybody knows about them and it is a big awareness-providing party. That's how it works, people. I am not lying. I know the master plan.

Here are some links to some fun stuff related to P4A:

Vlogbrothers Channel: www.youtube.com/vlogbrothers
www.livestream.com/projectforawesome
http://www.projectforawesome.com/
My P4A vid: www.youtube.com/StarTripProductions

Here are some of my favorite P4A videos:
www.youtube.com/italktosnakes
www.youtube.com/peron75
www.youtube.com/jpmetz
www.youtube.com/hiimrawntoo
www.youtube.com/NathanIsReallyBored

If you've made a video for P4A, link it in the comments and I will add you to this blog!

"Awkward is an emotion? I think of it more as a lifestyle."

-Natalie

People I Like Today

2009-12-08T18:06:00.000-08:00

1. Gibbs (NCIS) and Liam (90210)-They build boats.

2. Emily Morris-She has swagga (I do not know what that is so don't blame me for improper usage).

3. Keshav Ramaswami-We haven't been in any fights today.

4. Alyson Hannigan-For mothering an adorable baby!

5. Alexis Denisof-For fathering an adorable baby! (see pic.)

6. Cecil Witt-He's not nearly as crazy as that debate coach on Sunday's Cold Case.

7. My Secret Geek-for giving me 5 buckaroonies.

8. Anderson Cooper-For being made out of pure awesome.

9. Jack Dee-He bought me a cookie.

10. Celeste Rinner-For disobeying me when I told her explicitly NOT to wear leggings without something over them. I need to be disobeyed once in a while so I am not labled as a despot (vocab word *bonus points*)

That's it. I dislike everyone else today. JUST KIDDING I love you all! Well, most of you anyways.

-Natalie

Angel Season 5: Wolfram and Harties

2009-12-07T19:21:00.001-08:00

*SPOILER ALERT*

Gotta admit, Angel S5 is not my fave. I liked the hotel setting of seasons 3 and 4 more than Wolfram and Hart and I quite frankly miss Cordy. However, it's not like I am not enjoying watching it. I love Wes and Fred and I think all the twists with Lindsay and Gunn's brain-mojo are entertaining beyond belief. Thats not even to mention SPIKE. I love Spike and always have. He is by far my favorite of Buffy's...lovers (is that the right word?) with Angel coming in a verrrry close second. He (and Lorne!) adds the comic relief that the show really needs at the moment. His use of the word "ponce" and the entire cast's use of the word "corporeal" is getting more and more (you think I'm going to say annoying) but...GREAT. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. That's really all I have to say for the time. I AM NOT DONE YET, PEOPLE. SO HOLD YOUR HORSIES. I will finish soon and I may, or may not blog about it. (Probably not. Just being honest.)

Check out my new fave Buffy Tweeters www.twitter.com/GretchASketcha and www.twitter.com/shurefire and follow Alyson (Hannigan) Denisof: www.twitter.com/alydenisof.

"Astronauts don't stand a chance against cavemen."

-Natalie

Rant on Faulkner

2009-11-29T16:04:00.001-08:00

"As I Lay Dying" by William Faulkner is described by some as "consistantly ranked among the best novels of 20th century literature" (Yeah, I got that from Wikipedia so you know its credible). Described by my English teacher, the esteemed Marla Lindsay, as if all the chapters were thrown up in the air and then randomly gathered up so there is no order or chronology at all--this book is a weird sandwich. Take a look at the cover, people (see photo). It is a friggin decaying body! Smiling! In a wooden coffin! I'm thinking: What the freak. I'm gonna go ahead and judge this cover. As being weird. It reminds me a tad of when Buffy came back from the dead for the second time (In season 6) but with more smiling and it in fast forward instead of rewind. I am thinking that no one knows what I am talking about so I am going to go ahead and move on. This "novel" is about how this awful family is taking this dead women to go bury her. All they do is complain about the long (it isn't that long) journey and gripe about their dumb false teeth! The character names include Cash, Darl, Anse, Addie, Jewel (male), Dewey Dell (female) and some other...ummm...fascinating names that I don't even want to talk about. I am fairly sure that these people are supposed to be glorified hicks, so I can't decide if naming their kid Jewel is really upright or if it is even hickier than normal. Perhaps I shall tell you what I think when I am done with this book, but so far it is a hicky dud.

I appreciate some good imagery as much as the next person but describing a character as, "fading into the dusk as though darkness were a precursor of the ultimate earth, until at last the face seems to float detached upon it, lightly as the reflection of a dead leaf" is a tad to much for me. I liked The Scarlet Letter more. Nathanial Hawthorne would def beat Faulkner in a literary battle that I was judging.

Check out my favorite Youtube channel of the week: www.youtube.com/users/ryanseacrest

(I am not kidding! His New Moon premiere vids are the best! Sorry Kaleb Nation.)

-Natalie

DAbate Tourney

2009-11-13T14:34:00.000-08:00

What am I doing this weekend? Well, for once I am not debating (as misleading as the title may seem). I am witnessing my own school's debate tournament. "fun," you say. "INFESTED WITH CRAZIES," I say. I mean no offense to any debaters, you are all, for lack of any such better word, crazies. But I love you all. Mostly. Getting on with the point of this blog (there really is not any I just needed a transition phrase) I have written a poem about debate. You all know what a brilliant poet I am so you should appreciate this piece of fine craftmanship:

Ballots, Red Pens, Cross Ex, Crates
You know what I really hate?
Debate.

*takes a bow*

-Natalie

KITTYYYYYYSSSSS

2009-11-04T06:49:00.000-08:00

In working on my *Red Sin Society* project, at the Humane Society in Atchinson, Kansas, I have decided that I will adopt another cat. This CHAMPION of a cat will join my other kitty-minions to form a FELINE ARMY! Not really. Well...perhaps. I cannot attempt to control these fiends. Nevertheless, friends, I need a name for this cat. All of my ideas are problematic though...so HELP!

"You should not have taken advantage of my sensibility to steal into my affections without my consent". This quote illustrates the true CHAMPION-NESS of another, First Secretary of the Treasury, Alexander Hamilton. This is how I feel about most things in my life. Don't steal into my affections people...I haven't given you consent.

On a last note, anyone going to order an OWL CITY onesie?
www.districtlines.com/14519-Owl-City-Adult-Onesie-Misc/Owl-City

-Natalie

DOUGLAS L. JONES: Man of Mystery

2009-10-10T08:27:00.000-07:00

What? You don’t know who Douglas L. Jones is? It’s probably because of that doggone middle initial. You can’t see past the mystery of the L! Let me enlighten you: Douglas L. Jones is a jazz flute playing 8th grade Social Studies teacher with keen insight into Lost’s plot twists. (He predicted correctly who was dead in the coffin!) A man with such a strong and BEEFY name has got to be really, really important. And he is. His teachings mold the impressionable young minds of children throughout the UNIVERSE. Although it has been quite some time since I have actually encountered Mr. Jones, I remember fondly that class. That class was where I met my best friend. No, not Mr. Jones. It was actually Celeste. Nevertheless, I must admit most of the things that I learned in that class have stuck with me. Having children actually LEARN things is a feat to the likes of which Douglas Jones has proudly accomplished. What a man.

The Doug Jones Appreciation Society of America can be found at this link: http://www.facebook.com/search/?o=69&init=s%3Agroup&q=doug+jones#/group.php?gid=2204595112&ref=search&sid=713121520.911850327..1

good riddance...

-Natalie

Natalie's Totes Faves

2009-10-09T09:40:00.000-07:00

Season: Fall. Totes gorgeous. Halloween then Thanksgiving. LOVE IT!

*Educational* TV show: Liberty’s Kids and The Colbert Report. Education at its finest.

Cartoon show: Scooby Doo. This actually reminds me of a dream that I had last night. I was at this autograph signing for three of the cast members of the Scooby Doo movies. Sarah Michelle Gellar was there and I was really surprised because she just had a baby and she is usually doesn’t go to those things but anyway she was there and I got her autograph. And then I had a dream that I was putting some strawberry toaster strudels in the toaster oven, and then I woke up and they were not there and I was thoroughly disappointed. ):

Movie sequel: The Mummy Returns. That movie is frickin awesome. I love the part where Alex and the big burly black man are tapping their fingers on the table in the train, and then all of a sudden the big man takes his knife out and stabs between Alex’s fingers. Alex goes, “Oh wow that was amazing! Perfect aim!” and the big man replies, “What are you talking about? I missed.” Classic.

Brand of toothpaste: Crest.

Actor: Anton Yelchin. Charlie Bartlett and Alpha Dog and then Star Trek and Terminator Salvation in the same year?! This boy is amazing!

Breed of dog: www.twitter.com/clairewaggy

Meat: BEEF (follow with catchy slogan).

Baby name (boy and girl): Scarlett and Harry.

Harry Potter book: GOF!

Twilight book: NEW MOON

Live performance: http://www.youtube.com/user/StarTripProductions#p/f/39/YjO_VXHxsRw

Boxers or Briefs: I refer to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z81hJp_-OhY

Twilight Character: Carlisle. Who wouldn’t with this: http://www.youtube.com/user/StarTripProductions#p/f/15/1-H-lL2XJxU

President: Andrew Jackson

Movie line: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoytvHFflT0

YouTube video: http://www.youtube.com/user/StarTripProductions#p/f/11/qQ4b3S07riQ and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gC6KME0YtDE

HALLOWEEN...Costumage.

2009-10-08T09:55:00.000-07:00

While watching Halloweentown High on Disney Channel, I was inspired. Here are some of my most brilliant Halloween costume ideas for my bestie and I:

1. Gibbs and Abby from NCIS.
2. Damon and Stefan from Vampire Diaries.
3. The AcaFellas from Glee. (Provided we find 2 other unsuspecting folk.)
4. Jake and Amir. http://www.collegehumor.com/
5. Barats and Bereta. www.youtube.com/baratsandbereta
6. Mary and Ann Boleyn.
7. Buffy and Faith.
8. Dionne and Cher from Clueless.
9. Giselher and Siegfried from Ring of the Nibelungs.
10. The Hungarian Horntail and the Chinese Fireball (oooooh).
11. Spock and Kirk (always a classic).
12. Boggarts.
13. The Incredible Hulk and the Abomination (or Masterful Steg, whichever you prefer).
14. Ummm...an Oreo and a Ritz cracker?

I am gonna go ahead and end it there. Because when someone suggests you dress up as a Ritz cracker, then you know its time to quit while you're ahead.

"You know what we have to do now don't you?"(The Other Boleyn Girl)

-Natalie

Buffy and THE SWINE.

2009-10-07T17:36:00.000-07:00

*BUFFY SEASON SEVEN FINALE SPOILERS* Today, while quarantined on the couch with THE SWINE, I finished Season 7 of the acclaimed television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The awesomeness of the series finale rivaled that of the Brownie Bling Pothole and the recent news that JK Rowling has a Twitter (www.twitter.com/jk_rowling). I cried, gulped down my tears laughing, and sighed multiple times during this most stupendous episodes. The scene in which the potential slayers known as “the Potentials” stormed the Sunnydale High School basement armed with a legendary scythe that would allow them to behead the “uber-vamps” was probably the most empowering thing I have ever seen. Not kidding. Then Willow, with potential slayer and girlfriend Kennedy egging her on, performed a spell that harnessed the power of the scythe to give the slayer power to any girl that wants it, showing that there is a true slayer in all of us (awwwww). There was this brilliant montage of insecure girls standing up for themselves when their abusive dads tried to hit them and this little girl who got this wicked gleam in her eye as she stood at home plate ready for that baseball to come at her…man, it was great. Anyways, all of the potentials rushed in to the hell-den of the uber vamps and were staking and beheading like crazy and the vamps were poofing away when all of a sudden BUFFY GETS STABBED. Then everything gets all gaspy. Some live, some die, there is an inspiring last line. Like most shows but with more school buses, more Sunnydale caving in, and an increased case of tears. WATCH IT. *SPOILERS OVER*

Moving on, a friend (karatetentacles) introduced me to this “friggin” amazing girl on youtube today, JP Metz. (www.youtube.com/jpmetz) She does make-up tutorials with some extra…PIZZAZZ. Here ye goes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ui4B5sWgPWs&NR=1

Also, I am looking for some Halloween costume ideas. I was going to be Federico Garcia Lorca, but I am thinking of perhaps something more girly. You may be asking yourself, “What the heck is girlier than a deceased homosexual Spanish poet?” And to that, my dear friends, I have absolutely no answer.

"So what are we gonna do now?"

Oh Gnome!

2009-09-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

So short story short, my Bran Hambric book review was scheduled to be up today. But therein lies the rub: I haven't finished it! With my bronchitis and me being a precalc failure, I just have not had the time. If all goes as planned I should have my review up by Monday. Started it though and I just have to say: you are in for a treat. A really yummy, funny, gnomey treat...with all the warmness of the chocolate fudge in a brownie bling pothole and all the colorfulness of a mango smoothie from Panara.

"See you in another life brother"...

Book Review: Dreaming Anastasia

2009-09-12T06:17:00.000-07:00

Anne is having visions in the form of dreams. In these dreams she is someone else. Someone in another place and time. Anne is the Grand Duchess Anastasia. When a boy named Ethan shows up and tells her that the dreams are real, that they actually happened- well, that's when the action-and the trouble, begins.

When it comes to books, I will read pretty much anything. "Dreaming Anastasia" by Joy Preble was most certainly not just a lot of anything. This novel contains everything from the humorous sidekick's obsession with the word "wicked" to the actiony (that is definitely not a real word, though it should be) and fantastical fight scenes between Russian bad guys. Oh and did I mention the blossoming romance of Ethan and Anne? The strikingly handsome Ethan is predictably my favorite character. His point of view is an excellent contrast to Anne's, and I found myself pulling for their relationship to work out. From his debonair good looks to his captivating blue eyes, Ethan is truly Dreaming Anastasia's very own Edward Cullen. He's just about as old too... Can I just say that I found it astonishing that it was only Ms. Preble's first novel! (Yes, I can say it.) This book was clearly written with the finesse of a seasoned pro. One last smidgen of review stuffs for ye: I am in love with the story of the Romanovs. The idea that the Grand Duchess may have survived against all the odds placed against her is one which sparks hope. Though this novel did not make me believe, or even wonder, if perhaps she truly did survive. What it did do was give me a brilliantly crafted mystical escape. This novel is not only an entertaining read, but one that glows with the concepts of fantasy intertwined with reality.

A bientôt...

Movie Review: The Time Traveler's Wife (& Other Tidbits)

2009-08-16T13:23:00.000-07:00

To start this out I should say that I have not read the book that this movie is based on. So I do not have anything to compare it to. (Should I read it? You tell me.) Moving right along...

I liked this movie. The storyline was unique and intriguing, and Eric Bana and Rachel McAdams were an ideal choice for the roles. They were sweet, and their relationship was a realistic one (apart from the whole, my-husband-was-drying-a-dish-and-then-he-disappeared thing.)However, I feel that this is not one of the movies that I would like to watch again and again and again because I feel that it would be somewhat of a snooze fest. The suspense of not knowing the outcome is what I feel made this movie good, and I don't think that I would enjoy it as much if the suspense were taken away.

That is really the end of my review. You are probably gasping in astonishment at the realization that I could make it so short. But that all I have to say on the matter at the exact moment. I will have another couple of reviews up in September, for Bran Hambric: the Farfield Curse by Kaleb Nation, and Dreaming Anastasia by Joy Preble.

I think it would be germane to enter a little tidbit of info about an obsession of mine into this blog: College Humor. I don't know if you have been to http://www.collegehumor.com/, or seen any of their vids on youtube, but they are fantastically hilarious and deserve a bit of your time. My personal favorites are Streeter Theater: Phantom of the Kitchen, Overgrown Guy Girlfriend, and Jake and Amir: Scared. Each of their videos can be downloaded on iTunes for absolutely NO MULA (FREE!!) I am not trying to advertise for them, but if I were, would that be so bad? They deserve it.

I bid you adieu.

Book Review: Catching Fire

2009-08-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

I was fortunate enough to get my hands on an ARC of Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins (Thanks Suze). I finished consuming it approximatly 2.5 minutes ago. I closed it, looked astonished at its wonder, and then rushed downstairs to share its true awesomeness with you. Alright, so let me start this here review:

Catching Fire is the second part to The Hunger Games trilogy. For those of you rather unfortunate people who have not yet had the opportunity to read the first installment of the trilogy, The Hunger Games, I will give you brief summary with very few spoilers: Katniss Everdeen lives in a futuristic society that is separated into 12 Districts. Each year two people, a boy and a girl, are chosen "randomly" to compete in the Games. The Games are a death match, in which only may remain victorious. Minor inevitable spoiler, Katniss has to compete. That's all I'm gonna spill. Catching Fire is an absolute brilliant work of literature that shows Katniss' life after the Hunger Games. I do not feel that I am spoiling anything for you about the fact that Katniss lives after the Games, because if there is a sequel, obviously the main character is going to be in it. So there. (:

I really don't know what else to say. But I suppose the fact that I am speechless tells you enough. Because it is me who has nothing to say! The person whose voice seems to never stop running and who can blog about almost anything. (Brownie Bling Pothole anyone?) I do think that I can muster this: I absolutely adored this book. It was super-glued into my grasp from the minute it was handed to me. Suzanne Collins is a superb author because from the minute I finished reading The Hunger Games, I was not the least bit worried that Catching Fire would disapoint. My worry about sequels not being able to compete with their earlier counterpart has been something that not even J.K., nor Ms. Meyer could stop.

Suzanne Collins is a true credit to the world. Accusing me of exageration on this count will only prove you foolish after you have finished the book for yourself.

*I suppose I wasn't speechless after all. So thank you Ms. Collins for making me spit out more words than I thought I could about your fabulous work.

I cannot think of any parting words. So bye...

Yum Review: THE BROWNIE BLING POTHOLE

2009-08-03T18:13:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am aware that this is my second post with the word pothole in the title. I am also aware that I should give Twicon first priority as the topic of my blog. But I cannot. Alas, I have found something even more IMPRESSIVE. It is imperative that I tell you about this. It absolutely cannot wait.

The Brownie Bling Pothole.

This is the topic that I have chosen. Do you know what the Brownie Bling Pothole is? No? Only the most DELICIOUS, AMAZING, AWESOME, MAGNIFICENT, HEAVENLY, LUSCIOUS, MOUTHWATERING, DEVINE, PIQUANT, AND ENTICING creation ever produced on this here planet. And yes, I did just use a thesauras to look up other words for delicious and awesome. But come on, I can hardly think straight! I just had a bite! Let me give some small, pertinant details. This invention is a custard. From Sheridan's. It is vanilla custard with peanut butter and brownie chunks. But what makes it truly exceptional is that in the middle of all this beautiful stuff is hot fudge. Like a pound of it. Sheridan's tagline is "Sheridan's Means No Compromises". And let me just tell you that THIS IS NOT A LIE. (You need to trust me on this. Because if I have learned anything from Umbridge, it is that I MUST NOT TELL LIES.)

I am now going to give you some easy self-help tips. (Yes, this is pertinent.)
Step 1: Get up of your behind. (Finish reading this actually first)
Step 2: Get in your vehicle. Or mode of transportation. Or just run. Yeah, run.
Step 3: Go to Sheridan's.
Step 4: Buy a Brownie Bling Pothole.
Step 5: Consume it.

WELL GO ALREADY! NOW!

*I will get to Twicon as a topic, it just may be a day or two.

EVENTUALS

2009-07-27T13:10:00.000-07:00

This is a blog that I titled "Eventuals" because these are things that will eventually come to me, and that I will share with the universe, via this here blog.

#1: TWICON!*

#2: Interview with the OWNER of the BURGER CAR (I will now refer to it as thus).

#3: TWICON!

#4: Going to Texas for the first time in my life. Or in my dreams. (What was that dream thing? Ignore it. *thinks about deleting that sentence and then forgets about it*

#5: TWICON!

#6: TWICON!

#7: TWICON!
(Gorsh, I am super-into lists lately aren't I?)

*Check out www.twicon.org if you want to find out more info about this momentus event!

"YOU are the goodies."

2009-07-19T16:50:00.000-07:00

Oh my. Numerous things have occured since my last blog; most of which I will explain. The most share-worthy include:

#1: Getting my Driver's License.

#2: Discovering a new obsession.

#3: Seeing a brilliant movie (twice).

#4: Visiting the Grandparents.

I will now attempt to delve further into these subjects:
So yes, I finally received my driver's license. I woke up before 7 am to DRIVE to the DMV. I got there, gave all my info, paid, and took the eye exam. About the latter subject: I failed in the left eye region. whoopsies to that. But KUDOS TO ME RIGHT? I mean, I now have a little white, reciept-like slip of paper in my wallet that has little details about me! But moving on...

The obsession that I discovered is *drum roll please* BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER. I'd heard of it, I just hadn't watched it until a little over a week ago. Then I watched it. Words cannot describe how much awesomeness that show holds. Yeah, maybe everyone else in the world discovered it before me but I *blows raspberry* to that. Because I got to watch the first 3 seasons in under a week. For those who do not know that is just about 39.5 hours. Darn proud of it.

The film that I saw was none other than HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE. I dressed as Hedwig to the midnight premiere to which I arrived at 7 pm. And to those who care to know, I enjoyed it immensly. The explanation for which could be because it is my favorite book from the series, or it could simply be because the movie was a fantastic piece of cinema that was dazzling to the ears, eyes, and all other receptors of the body.

This weekend my mother and I drove to St. Louis to visit my grandparents. I will now include a quote from my grandma that I think sums up the weekend quite well: "What was that?!? A cell phone? OOOH. I thought that it was someone blowing a horn. Man my eyes are dirty." And to finish up the mix I'll throw in a mom quote for y'all: "It crossed my mind to use this straw as a wand and curse you. But it would be a minor curse."

This post is dedicated to Joss Whedon for creating Buffy, David Yates for directing HP6, the lady at the DMV for giving me my license, and my grandparents for being themselves.

Movie Review: Little Ashes

2009-07-06T12:12:00.000-07:00

For this blog I am going to do something that I haven't done yet. A review. So here goes: This weekend I saw Little Ashes. I had first heard of this movie in November and was excited for it not just because Rob Pattinson was a lead, but because he played a character that is known to most of us. I waited for months on end and FINALLY it came to Kansas City! So here is what I thought:

This movie was about the lives of Federico Garcia Lorca, a poet (played by Javier Beltran), and Salvador Dali, the well known artist (Rob Pattinson). This film was genuinely good. It was both an interesting portrayal of the times and a heartwrenching love story. The cinematography was absolutely breathtaking and the music was meaningful & fitting. Dali was an eccentric; and Rob plays the oddball well. He was dazed and strange and his love scenes with Beltran were extremely convincing. (In case you were not aware, Dali and Garcia Lorca were lovers.) I had never seen Javier Beltran in anything else and his performance was eye opening. Though the character of Dali was more fun to watch, Beltran played Garcia Lorca in a way that made you interested in what he had to say. This film was a beautiful representation of how both artists impacted each other's lives and each other's art. The ending of Little Ashes was extremely sad, and my movie partner was brought to tears.

One of my favorite scenes was one toward the beginning in which Garcia Lorca was playing the piano. You are looking at his face as he plays and in the background, half-behind a glass door, you see Dali staring at him as he plays, seemingly soaking up the music, and Garcia Lorca himself! Another of my favorites was one in which the men were sitting in a room that Dali had decorated with paper snowflakes, discussing the play that Garcia Lorca was writing. The thing I loved about this scene is that you got to see how they work together while they are wearing super-humorous outfits; they have cloth tied around their head kind of Quirrel-like, and sashes around their waists.

Parts of this movie were laugh out loud funny, but I am not sure if that was because they were written to be that way, or if I just have an unhealthy obsession with Rob. You tell me.

NARY A CHERRY

2009-07-03T14:17:00.000-07:00

On the way to get my Driver's License on Thursday, my dad and I drove to Sonic. I ordered a monstrous Route 44 cherry limeade and was enjoying it thoroughly when my father asked to see the documents that I needed to get my DL. It unfortunatly turns out that I had switched one of the documents that I was supposed to have with my parents' marriage license. Now for one of my famous equations:

Natalie - 1 VID (Very Important Document) + Route 44 limeade = NO LICENSE

That was disappointment #1. #2 started when I pulled of the lid of my limeade and reached into the depths of the foam cup, past the leetle pieces of melting ice and lime quarters, to grab my cherry. Which was not there. This may seem to be a trivial disappointment to you, but I can assure you it was like getting a piece of chewed up and spit out nothing when you really want a dog-gone CHERRY.

Another recent occurrence was my trip to the Toy and Miniature Museum*. I am not sure that I would label it a disappointment, but more of a horror show. Now, I am not one of those people who doesn't fully appreciate the enormity of a Pez collection, or a miniature grand piano complete with ivory keys and sheet music, but I am one of those people that gets extremely creeped out by DOLLS. Dolls that stare at you like their faces are frozen in time and have clothes that were hand stitched by monks in dungeons and old "Mrs Haversham" ladies. Dolls that are crowded together staring at you no matter where you move...their eyes are still following me...

Did that creep you out? Because just typing that and thinking of their marble eyes and their ratty hair that I am pretty sure is REAL, got me extremely creeped out. If you ever want to put me in complete and utter Hell, be sure to make me work at that place.

*Nothing that I have said is meant to be the same for everyone. Maybe you are into weird dolls and stuff. For example, my mother thoroughly enjoyed herself and only thought that it was a little creepy. So go there and see for yourself. Just please, please don't invite me.

SANDWICH OR HAMBURGER?

2009-06-29T07:03:00.000-07:00

Is the Sandwich Car really a Hamburger Car? I have given this question a lot of thought. So I thought I would use dictionary.com to help me answer this question that is ruining my sleep cycle. Dictionary.com sites a sandwich as: two or more slices of bread or the like with a layer of meat, fish, cheese, etc., between each pair. A hamburger is defined as: a sandwich consisting of a cooked patty of ground or chopped beef, usually in a roll or bun, variously garnished. The Kansas City Star first refers to it as a "sandwich on wheels" and then later a "burger mobile". http://www.kansascity.com/199/story/1253750.html

So really I have no idea. The previously referred to"Sandwich Car" has bread and meat which I personally would think is a sandwich, but it is "variously garnished" like a hamburger. So the question that would pinpoint exactly what this Car is, is whether or not the meat is a cooked patty of beef. I truly cannot tell from just looking at the Car because I am not a professional meat identifier. So in order to help me with this MASS OF CONFUSION that is brewing, I have a scheduled interview with THE OWNER OF THE CAR, JOE ZWILLENBERG. (next week!)

Also, is the Car actually a Truck? There are so many questions I have that I am sure I have passed on to you people. So if you have any questions for Zwillenberg, leave them in comments!

The Sandwich Car

2009-06-27T19:22:00.000-07:00

Tonight I dined at a sushi place in Waldo, MO called the Kokoro Maki House. After a pleasant meal of California rolls, cucumber salad, pork dumplings, and stir fry, we decided to head on down to Westport (downtown Kansas City) to go to a large branch Half Price Books. On our way we passed a little restaurant, in front of which was THE SANDWICH CAR. This vehicle was no mode of transporting sandwiches or even advertising for a sandwich eatery, but a literal car that looked like a huge sandwich. You know, looking back in my mind at it, the car was rather long, like a station wagon, so you might call the car a Sub Sandwich Car. From the floppy bits of lettuce to the brown meaty-looking bun, this car was seriously DECKED OUT. Occasionally I will pass one of the Red Bull cars (you know the ones with the can on the top) and appreciate that piece of awesome but understand- that is nothing compared to the Sandwich Car. Whomever owns this piece of artwork: I revere you and your amazing ride.

So one would think that after being so entirely AWED at this SCULPTURE OF AWESOMENESS, I would have taken a photo. But alas, when I asked my father to turn the car around and go around the block so that I could take one, he said that it would be there when we came back from the bookstore. While browsing the book store, I had this leetle feeling that it would not be there as my father had said it would. I rushed us along so as to make my fear not come true. Unfortunately, when we drove past that little restaurant THE SANDWICH CAR WAS GONE.

So I dedicate this post to THE SANDWICH CAR and make it my life's goal to find it, photograph it, and post it to this page. It will happen.

POTHOLE ALERT!

2009-06-26T15:57:00.001-07:00

So today was my second driving experience with my instructor, Ron. He was due to arrive at my house at 3:30, so as to not completely startle myself when he rang the doorbell, I sat on the counter next to the kitchen sink, flipping through the most recent Teen Vogue (Emma Watson). I was so engrossed in the fashion spreads of girls wearing leggings without skirts or shorts over them (so many things wrong with that) that when I took a glance out the window and saw that Ron was in the driveway I fell off the counter and lost my place in the magazine (though that's probably for the best).

Moving on! Two main things happened during this lesson that I feel that I must share. First off: PARALLEL PARKING. I have many reasons why I do not like parallel parking. 1. There are like 15 billion steps to doing it. Turn wheel left, line it up to the pole thingy, get it so that you can see the pole in the mirror to the left side but not ALL THE WAY OVER and not TOO FAR TO THE RIGHT. What? 2. When am I ever going to need this? (If I ever (God forbid) show up somewhere and there are no parking spaces save for one that I need to use parallel parking to get into, I will just leave. Even if it is to the inauguration of Anton Yelchin as President. But wait...he can't actual be President because he was born in St Petersburg. Darn. Well you get the point.)

So finally we were done with parallel parking and we were going to leave the parking lot. Out of the blue Ron grabs my wheel, and swerves the car to the left. Nothing is there so automatically I just swerve the car back because we were about to run into the median. Ron yells at me I DO THIS ALL DAY DON'T YOU THINK THAT I KNOW WHAT I AM DOING WHY DID YOU TRY TO CONTROL THE WHEEL WHEN I HAD IT!? (I paraphrased a bit) All that was there were a few potholes that I was already going to miss. What the heck Ron? Basically from that point on I was in shock from his angry yelling...I cannot even tell you what else I did. So as to end this post I have a question: Do all young people learning to drive have these kind of experiences? That is to say experiences full of dispair and doom?

The EXPANSION

2009-06-25T13:55:00.000-07:00

Wowie. This is my first post. As I roll my fingers over this keyboard attempting to figure out what to write I am wondering: What exactly does one write about in a blog? Does one try to write to the masses? Or do I simply do this for my own enjoyment and not worry about the tiny details? While I wait for those answers from God-knows-who I will concentrate on the latter; doing this for ME. So lets get this started. Bonjour, my name is Natalie Parker and I am 16. On August 16th I will be a junior* at a public high school. To truly introduce myself I should start off by showing some of my twitter messages. That way you can see a little slice of what I have to say and how exactly I say it (in case you haven't already caught on). Here are my my most recent tweets. Oh wait...I suppose that I should tell you a little bit so you get what these mean. So I have been taking a Defensive Driving course, which I refer to as DD, to improve my sad driving skills and to bring down our insurance costs. About an hour and a half ago, I got home from my first, two hour long drive with the instructor. So here are three posts about my driving experience:

1. My DD driving = MOST TRAUMATIC THING EVER and full of IRONY. Seriously...I am in shock from it. *considers peeing in pants to show shock*

2. The instructor kept telling stories of his life. I now know EVERYTHING. 1. he was a po po man. 2. he saw a dead guy. 3. blah blah blah

3. I think he was trying to DISTRACT me. *looks around in realization* Oh did I mention that I almost made an improper left hand turn?!!!!!!!!

So there you go for now. I hope that, along with the whole entire introduction paragraph shows you a tad more about me. You may have one more question (you may not but I am going to answer it anyway): Why did I start this blog? Well I am on Twitter and I update a lot. A lot is not a hyperbole. I have updated 873 times in just over two months. So I decided that instead of completely exploding the amount that will show up on my best friends cell phone bill because she gets all of my tweets directly to her phone, I would blog. Also it is darn hard to fit all that you have to say into 140 characters. You could call this blog the EXPANSION. Cause that's what I am doing. (hopefully only figuratively.)